Days 4 and 5: Normalcy

Day 4

I started this day off with lunch at the development center and I was SUPER uncomfortable. I typically hate eating in front of others or being around others while they're eating and adding that to an already new environment and I was struggling. I noticed that the center has high expectations for their clients. One was practicing using a fork to get food from the plate to their mouth. They kept wanting to use their fingers but the staff encouraged them to use the fork. The client knew how to use the fork, but was being stubborn and it took forever for them to eat lunch. Fortunately, I was able to force myself out of my bubble and talk to those around me for the next 30 minutes until lunch was over.

The class I was with then went to the kitchen to learn about germs and why washing our hands (with the techniques they'd been taught previously) is important. The staff member took a bowl of water and poured pepper on top of the water to represent the germs. They then took soap and rubbed in into their finger and dipped said finger into the pepper water. The reaction of the pepper was so cool!

 (ps I reacted about the same as the kids in this video lol)


Day 5

I got to the development center and was told a group of clients had gone bowling and I could either stay at the center for part of a class or go to the Bowling Alley. Obviously I chose to go bowling. :) When I got to the lanes there was literally no one but the three clients and one center staff member. As I hung out with everyone I was thinking about how normal this had become. I still have a problem with talking to them in a way that I wouldn't do with my typically developing peers and that REALLY bothers me, but I'm able to see them more now that what I had before. They are people with interests, hobbies, and preferences. They like to joke and be silly and become upset when things don't go as planned. Then I remembered that some of them grew up in a period in our school systems where they were in separate schools and maybe not treated as respectfully as their peers. That was heartbreaking. My goal in life is to do everything I can so that others won't feel as rejected and lonely as I have felt at times, but I realized I wasn't extending that desire to ALL of my brothers and sisters. I was extending it only about as far as I was comfortable. That is not the purpose of love.

"Jesus said love EVERYONE, treat them kindly too. When your heart is filled with love, others will love you."

Day 3: More Familiar

Today at the Development Workshop we worked on more fine motor activities. When I initially get to the center, the clients are in transition so I end up either talking to them or playing games. Today we played Uno, and it got INTENSE. The +4’s were rolling and I ended up having to draw 12 cards. After I gathered my cards we continued playing and one client got angry and pushed another one. At this point the teacher asked if there could have been a better way to handle the situation, like maybe expressing what was wrong. I felt uncomfortable for a moment because I don’t know how to deal with conflict effectively and I’m still not entirely comfortable with those who seem so different.

After Uno we weaved yarn through plastic mesh, which is actually pretty difficult. Some were really good at it while others were new to the idea. I wasn’t able to stay for the whole activity but I liked how the activities were designed to build on each other. The teacher told the clients they were working on being able to sew on a button, and asked why that would be an important skill to learn.

It reminded me that no matter where one is on the development scale, there’s always room to grow; to learn more. It reminded me of how much our Heavenly Father shows us patience and is willing to do anything to help us progress, to develop, to improve. And I’m so thankful. I only wish I could see everything as clearly as He does. 

Day 2: Familiar Unknown

I'm not sure if today was harder, or easier. The managers were back from training so the center was a bit more organized than yesterday. Classes here are different than in a general education classroom.
 First-we're all adults.
Second-no one is restricted to sitting down and being quiet during instruction.
Third-the relationship between teacher and student/client seems more like a peer relationship.

Today, the class started out by asking me questions about myself to build social, communication and cognitive skills. With some clients it was hard to understand what they were trying to ask and I had to get a lot of help from the teacher. This is hard. I want to be able to talk to them on my own, to be able to engage without being confused. Part of the center's intervention is to have the clients repeat back each word to work on enunciation. Ex: Client wants to go look out the window. I have him repeat back "I. Want. To. Look. Out. Window." This is harder than just restating because it takes more time and the client may become frustrated.

We also played "Get to know you" bingo, much like what eager freshmen and bored upper-class-men play during an LDS young-single adult opening social. We got up and asked each other different questions and then if that attribute discribed them (likes to fish, loves eating chocolate) then they write their name in the square. I was surprised that some couldn't actually write letters and I didn't know if I should help them write letters or just let them be. Hopefully that's something I'll learn more about. How much do I push them and what do I leave for later? What I did learn is that it's important to just be myself and joke around like I normally do (sans sarcasm) and to build relationships like I would otherwise.

Elder M. Russell Ballard included the idea in his talk "Doctrine of Inclusion," that as humans, we ALL have the same needs. We have spirits that are struggling to gain control of our mortal bodies. We're all trying to find ways to express ourselves in ways that mean something to others. We want to love and connect with others; to belong.

How can we express ourselves when we don't have control over our bodies; when our minds wont collaborate with our bodies and our spirits? How do we facilitate expression in others?

Day 1: Unfamiliar Territory

"Is man, kind? Are we good? Go see. Look thru their windows so you can understand their views. Sit at their tables so you can share their tastes.  Sleep in their beds so you may know their dreams. Go see, and find out just how kind  the hes and shes of this man kind are."

I heard this quote from an Airbnb commercial and fell in love. I was bitten with the travel bug early on in life and I've spent a lot of time discovering new people and new cultures. They bring a new way of thinking, doing, and being; and I'm obsessed with learning about them.

However, I am initially reserved around new people. I stand awkward, with my arms folded, never making eye contact. Today was no different. For my SPED 310 class, we're assigned to volunteer at the Development Workshop, Inc for five hours this semester and it was nothing like what I expected. The atmosphere was super relaxed; most were bantering back and forth, and laughing. They have jobs and other responsibilities in the community. They have likes and dislikes. But I still struggled to connect.The hardest part about today was how uncomfortable I felt. For some reason I don't know how to interact with people who have disabilities. Is it naivety, ignorance, arrogance, or something else?

I'm reminded of how the Savior loved without qualification. He loved and advocated for the sinner, the lame, and the lost. He knew how to be a friend and a confidant. It's sappy, but if I keep Christ as a reference then I'll be better equipped to leave the ninety and nine and make a difference to the one.

How do we find confidence to love the unknown?